Childhood Horrors

Mother made me aware of the conditions of public restrooms at a very early age. Between my mother and my own f’ed up thoughts, it was no surprise I would shit my pants instead of using the public facilities. The hard thing for a youth to realize is that the same woman persuading you to not use the public toilet would ridicule you at the house.

I attended kindergarten in an ancient building. large rock building, high ceilings and long hall. The facilities for the boys – two toilets, open to all, and a round trough to piss in. The boys would play motorcycle on the toilets by sitting on them backward and flushing the throttle.  I recall one day when I just took care of business in my pants instead of reliving myself in such an environment. I continued with my day until the end of school. Two memories are clear. When my mother picked me up she was very upset. I sat on the vinyl interior of the white Impala, shifting from side to side, feeling that I had done the right thing. My next memory is in my bed with a cloth diaper on. I am not sure how long I was in the bed or how long the diaper stayed on.


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